Jan. 2nd, 2017

jeb124: (Default)
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amorremanet:

wufflyboo:

harry’s behavior in order of the phoenix was ptsd you jerks

#not here for anyone complaining about harry being ‘whiny’ or ‘a drama queen’ #he’s an orphan who escaped from an abusive home only to be emotionally manipulated into a child soldier #he suffered extensive yearly traumas all connected to the guy who murdered his parents #he was forced to watch a friend get murdered #and then was tortured with the unforgivable curses #he was the target of a smear campaign led by the minister of magic #and he was deliberately isolated from his friends and entire support network while being returned to an abusive home #before he had any chance to deal with that #he’s a fifteen year old boy #who has been forced into unspeakable horror and torment since he was eleven #and his outbursts in ootp don’t make him weak they make him human #and the most amazing thing is that that’s the limit of his breaking #harry james potter is strong af
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muffinworry:

Because I’ve been collecting them, here are some of my favourite weird news headlines from the past year:

  

·      Top RNC Strategist uses My Little Pony to Defend Melania Trump

 

·      Large Hadron Collider temporarily shut down by unauthorized weasel entry

 

·      Are Haribo a Tangfastic choice for Cameron’s Brexit talks?

 

·      Pokemon Go Players Have Now Found A Third Dead Body

 

·      “’Giant nose’ to sniff out life on Mars prepares for launch”

 

·      Dead Man’s Parrot Could Become Key Witness In Murder Trial

 

·      10-YEAR-OLD ACCIDENTALLY CREATES NEW MOLECULE IN SCIENCE CLASS

 

·      Woman Comes Home To Find ‘Pole-Dancing’ Koala

 

·      Burglary Suspect Allegedly Used Human Brain To Get High. Police said the suspect nicknamed the brain “Freddy.”

 

·      Fetid Corpse flower Overwhelms New York

 

·      Dead Gorilla Harambe Earns 5% in Poll Against Clinton and Trump

 

·      What can killer whales teach us about the menopause?

 

·      Polls suggest Iceland’s Pirate party may form next government

 

·      Hunter S. Thompson’s Widow Returns the Antlers He Stole From Ernest Hemingway’s House 52 Years Ago

 

·      Dick Assman of Regina dies at age 82

 

·      Piranhas with human-like teeth in Michigan

 

·      Fake human sacrifice filmed at Cern, with pranking scientists suspected

 

·      FEC to crack down on ‘Deez Nuts’ and other ‘candidates’

 

·      Fifteen hundred possibly drunk Americans successfully invade Canada via the St. Clair River

 

·      Scientists fight crab for mysterious purple orb discovered in California deep

 

·      Crusader-era hand grenade surprises archaeologists

 

·      A sex-mad tortoise which is over 100 years old has single-handedly saved his species from extinction

 

·      Hundreds of nuns trained in Kung Fu are biking the Himalayas to oppose human trafficking

 

·      Everything You Need To Know About The ‘Clown Attack’ Craze

 

·      Canada forces investigate mysterious ‘pinging’ sound coming from sea floor

 

·      Cop offers heartfelt apology for threatening to punish drunk drivers with Nickelback

 

·      Newt Gingrich and Smash Mouth Duke It Out for Worst Pearl Harbor Day Take

 

·      Cuba offers to pay off debt to Czech Republic in rum
jeb124: (Default)
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mira-of-sassgard:

oceansideopus:

roachpatrol:

ao3sburbanite:

roachpatrol:

roachpatrol:

“I’m disgusted,” said Professor McGonagall. “Four students out of bed in one night! I’ve never heard of such a thing before!”

(from the philosopher’s stone)

minerva you fucking liar

so ok i bet minerva’s spent like the last thirty years pretending to students that their transgressions are totally unique new crimes just to really shame them

sneaking off to the astronomy tower to make out? she’s never heard of such a thing before. sneaking into the herbology greenhouses to find something to get high on? she’s never heard of such a thing before. sneaking off to the forbidden forest to make out and get high? she’s never heard of such a thing before. sneaking off to the kitchens for midnight snack parties (while high and making out)? she’s never heard of such a thing before. trying to sneak back into the tower via flying a broom through an outside window after a previously successful night of misdoing? she’s never heard of such a thing before and neither has the pink lady. 

not since she was in school and doing all that herself, anyway. 

This is literally what teachers do. 

They have to make it seem like every misbehaviour is new and shocking because if they just went “damn son that’s nothing, when I was your age I jumped off the school roof and yelled fuck all the way down” it would be impossible to give them detention for throwing a pen across the room.

I was once in a lesson during my teacher training where a kid left a drawing of a dick on the teacher’s chair and she acted like the kid had killed her puppy in front of her. After the lesson we both laughed our asses off about it, she wasn’t insulted in the least, it just wasn’t acceptable behaviour.

Tl;dr Minerva is being a great teacher, and she’s probably got a poll going with the other staff at Hogwarts as to what crazy shit Harry and Co. will do next. 

yes i love this. she probably got back to the staff room and was like ‘ALRIGHT, LET’S MARK IT DOWN, I JUST CAUGHT POTTER THE SEQUEL SNEAKING OUT ON A MISADVENTURE WITH HIS LITTLE FRIENDS,’ and everyone groans and rummages in their pockets to settle their bets. 

Potter the Sequel

Still losing it about potter sequel
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ekjohnston:

grantairezee:

bedlamsbard:

barrissoffee:

Remember when Luke compares shooting womp rats to blowing up a space station

womp rats

#wedge is just like #oh my god this kid is gonna die #spoiler alert you’re the only two who survive! (via kablob17)

I bet this is like the basis of their relationship, though. Rebel command is like, alright go and face certain death doing xzy task. It will be difficult and you have to go fast. Luke is like “pffffff I did that at home so many times only the target was smaller. And moving. And I really couldn’t see that well because sand. This is gonna be cake, guys. CAKE.” Wedge’s reaction the first couple times, even after the death star, is basically that picture. But eventually he’s like sweet space jesus what terrible planet are you from that you keep telling me all these nigh impossible tasks are cake? Everyone’s like oh skywalker is a softie. He’s a squishy ball of love and sunshine, and wedge is like yeah. That is all extremely true but he is also MADE OF TEMPERED DEATH.

(After like the first 3 times Luke starts messing with Wedge. He’s like they want us do run these cables to the bottom of that extremely ominous cravasse? I did that one time when I was five, and uncle owen had me wire the relays with my toes because we had to shoot down this pack of anoobas that were trying to kill us and eat us. Wedge is just like that can’t be true, and yet…)

I really hope Wedge is still alive so that Rey can be all “On my crappy desert planet…” and Wedge can be all “OH GOD NOT AGAIN.”
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lastoneout:

raise a glass to freedom, something they can never take away
jeb124: (Default)
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shayalonnie:

blithelybonny:

marauders4evr:

You read that correctly.

I just came to a very grim realization that makes a ton of sense. (Note: This might have been realized by others as well.)

We know that in the Tale of the Three Brothers, Death’s main goal was to kill the brothers right? He was pissed because they had cheated him and he wanted to take their lives once and for all.

And so he gives the eldest brother the wand, knowing that someone would end up killing him for it. The youngest brother knows what Death is up to and takes his Invisibility Cloak, much to Death’s reluctance, so that he can hide from Death until he’s ready to face him. And the middle brother? The middle brother was given the Resurrection Stone.

And what did the stone do?

It brought back his wife (sort of) and gave the brother such a huge desire to be with her that he ended up taking his own life.

Pfft. Can you imagine? The sort-of-kind-of appearance of your dead loved one convincing you to go die.

Hahahaha…ha…yeah…

And here’s where it gets dark.

We know that Harry was willing to die for his friends because he’s a noble git whose face pops up in the dictionary next to the word: “self-sacrifice”.

The only thing he was missing was the stigmata. (In fact, I’m surprised Jo didn’t put something like that in; she wasn’t exactly subtle about it.)

Anyway, we know that Harry begins walking to the forest and though he is determined, he also begins to have second thoughts:

And then he activates the Resurrection Stone - the stone that Death intentionally used to kill the second brother.

And what happens?

Harry’s loved ones appear to him, though they look odd (and that’s important; we’ll come back to that later) and they’re totally fine with him dying and even convince him that they’re proud of him for what doing what he’s doing, that it doesn’t hurt at all, and that it’ll be quick.

So in conclusion, the four people who have gone above and beyond multiple times to protect this child are completely fine with him dying.

I mean Lily, the woman who leapt in front of her child and demanded to be killed in his place, only tells him that he’s been brave and doesn’t say anything else. The woman who repeatedly pleaded for Harry’s life supposedly stands there and just lets him go die.

Yeah, that’s in character (//sarcasm).

But of course, that’s not Lily, is it?

It’s not James.

It’s not Sirius.

It’s not Remus.

I don’t even think it was the middle brother’s wife.

I don’t think that the Resurrection Stone brings back your loved ones at all. I think it shows you whatever it can to convince you to die.

That’s why James, Lily, Remus, and Sirius were all described as looking different than how they had died. (As opposed to say Nearly Headless Nick who looked exactly how he looked when he died, semi-detached head and all). And why the wife of the brother was described as looking/acting odd as well.

They weren’t really there. They were basically magical holograms who said what they needed to say so that Harry wouldn’t have any second thoughts as he marched towards death. And Death. 

Because who greets him?

That’s right, Death himself.

I mean Dumbledore.

I mean…no actually there’s been this really amazing theory going around for a while now that Dumbledore = Death and it actually makes a lot of sense.

Especially if you add my theory that Dumbledore intentionally gave Harry the Resurrection Stone so that when he was about to die, he would see magical holograms of his loved ones who would convince him that he was making the right choice, that it wouldn’t hurt, that they were proud of him, etc.

Because we know that Dumbledore wanted Harry to die. Harry was raised like a pig for slaughter. Note: He didn’t want Harry to be dead. He just wanted Harry to go through the action of dying so that Voldemort would be destroyed.

And so Dumbledore added this little detail to make sure that, well, the job would get done. 

So in conclusion:

Centuries ago, Death wanted someone to die. He gave the person a stone that made an image (just an image) of his loved one, which convinced said person that he needed to die.

Centuries later, Death wanted someone to die. He gave the person a stone that made images (just images) of his loved ones, which convinced said person that he needed to die.

This made me feel a lot of things and I don’t have the capacity to explain them all without curling into a ball and weeping for hours, but suffice it to say that What. And Why Would You Do This To Me?
jeb124: (Default)
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faun-songs:

dreamlordmorpheus:

This is without a doubt the best author’s note I’ve ever read. 
jeb124: (Default)
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donnajosh:

Because it’s something we pass on. Something with a history so we can say, “My father gave this to me. His father gave it to him, and now I’m giving it to you.”

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