Feb. 14th, 2017

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whedonverseappreciation:

Whedonverse Appreciation | River Tam

[½] Relationships
River & Simon
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funforahermit:

“So. What do you guys wanna do tomorrow?”
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derinthemadscientist:

factsinallcaps:

THE LEGENDARY STORY OF THE TROJAN HORSE DOES NOT INVOLVE THE GREEKS GIVING THE HORSE TO THE TROJANS AS A GIFT. THE GREEKS’ DECEPTION WAS ACTUALLY THAT THEY LEFT THE HORSE AS AN OFFERING TO THE GODDESS ATHENA. 

IN THE LEGEND, THEY BASICALLY SENT SOMEONE TO TROY TO SAY “THIS HORSE IS FOR ATHENA, NOT YOU, SO OUR RETREAT BACK TO GREECE IS SAFE. DON’T TRY TO TAKE IT. IT WON’T FIT THROUGH THE GATES OF YOUR CITY, SO THERE’S NO WAY YOU DICKS CAN STEAL IT AND PRETEND YOU GOT IT FOR ATHENA. NOT FOR TROJANS.”

AND THEN TROY WAS LIKE “YOU’RE NOT OUR DAD. WE WON THIS WAR AND WE’RE TAKING YOUR STUPID HORSE AS A TROPHY SO WE’LL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW BAD GREECE IS AT DESTROYING TROY.” 

AND A FEW TROJANS WERE LIKE “THIS IS A TRICK” AND TRIED TO EXPOSE IT AS A TRICK BUT THE REST OF THE TROJANS WOULD HAVE NONE OF IT BECAUSE EVERYONE WAS SWEPT UP IN THE THRILL OF VICTORY, AND ALSO BECAUSE THE GODS KEPT SENDING SNAKES TO STRANGLE ANYONE WHO SAID ANYTHING, BECAUSE THE GREEK GODS HAD NO WORD FOR “SUBTLETY”

THEN AT NIGHT ALL THE GREEKS JUMPED OUT OF THE HORSE LIKE “WE TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE THE HORSE, WHY ARE YOU SUCH PRIDEFUL DICKS” AND BURNED DOWN THE WHOLE CITY

This makes a lot more sense
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chasertiff:

ohdeerjily:

Imagine first year Harry Potter looking for Fred and George to see if they want to have a snowball fight with him and Ron and finding an odd piece of parchment lying in their room. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter picking the parchment up and examining it, because he’s learning that in the wizarding world nothing is ever as it seems, not even old pieces of parchment. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter tapping his wand to the parchment to see if anything happens and, to his surprise, seeing thin, angular writing appear as if written by an invisible hand. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter’s excitement when the parchment reads: Mr. Prongs asks who is trying to uncover the carefully guarded secrets of the Marauders. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter whispering “My name is Harry Potter and I didn’t mean to pry,” before hurriedly trying to refold it and return it to where he’d found it 

Imagine first year Harry Potter’s astonishment when the writing reappears, this time saying: Let Mr. Prongs share his immense joy that Harry Potter has found this. He hopes that Harry will find the contents of this parchment useful and use it in a way that would make his father proud. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter’s smile sliding off his face as he says quietly, “I don’t know. My father’s dead, you see. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter’s confusion when the writing appears once again, saying: Mr. Prongs wishes to tell Harry Potter that while his father may be dead, he is still looking out for him and is incredibly proud of him. Mr. Prongs hopes that Harry Potter knows his father loves him very much. 

Imagine first year Harry Potter taking the map back to his dormitory and spending the rest of the evening talking to the mysterious Mr. Prongs about his mother and father, about whom the invisible man seems to know quite a bit.

This is beautiful, so forgive me, but–
imagine first year harry potter tapping the parchment and asking about his parents
imagine first year harry potter saying his parents are james and lily potter
and then– EXCUSE ME BUT MSSRS PADFOOT, MOONY, AND WORMTAIL WOULD LIKE TO REGISTER THEIR ASTONISHMENT THAT A PRAT LIKE MR. PRONGS EVER ENDED UP MARRIED TO LILY EVANS LET ALONE HAD SEX WITH HER
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kylo-reylo-trash:

godzillaturds:

there isn’t any wind in space, so Darth Vader was using the Force to make his cape flow for #aesthetic

People can only dream of being this extra
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trek-tracks:

My name is Bones

And wen its day

I jab you with

A hypospraey

Accept yur fate

With joy I lurk

I vaccinate

I stabb the Kirk
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A video posted by Thomas Sanders (@thomassanders) on Feb 11, 2017 at 4:36pm PST

harrypotterconfessions:

minimarker:

thatsthat24:

A New Teacher for the Wizarding World ✨

This is my dream job

Prof: Alright everyone, welcome to your new hogwarts course! Algebra.Student: What? I thought this was arithmancy?Prof: Naw i changed it to arithmaTIC, nobody teaches basic math here.Student: We know enough to–Prof: Whats five times four?Student: MmmagicProf: Thats what I thought.
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next-scamander:

i love watching tv shows that aired in the early 2000s because we get to see the evolution of the cell phone

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