Apr. 19th, 2017

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So I have this head cannon based on my own family that the bat kids have a habit of saying “my brother”/”my sister” like everyone knows who they’re talking about. People who know about the whole batclan can usually guess which bro/sis based on the context, but everyone else just assumes there’s only one brother and one sister. 

Imagine Tim starting YJ and being super secretive about his identity, so no one knows he’s Tim Drake with 7.5 billion Wayne siblings. Which leads to the hilarious assumption that Tim just has one brother, and who does. So. Much

Grew up in a circus, and by circus he means the streets, and by streets he means a palace in Dubai. Born in Gotham but also in the middle east but he’s Cuban and black? Can’t drive a car, but can drive a motorcycle? Is married, but also ‘partners’ with some guy named roy and is also like twelve? Died?? But apparently he got better?? 

And his sister is a mute computer genius who’s both super dramatic, and pretty stoic, faked her own death once?? and is an Asian ginger, and might be the child of Catwoman and Batman??

People would think he’s making it up, except he says these things so casually and with such a straight face that there’s no way it’s a joke. 

Until one day some brave soul is like “Hey Robin, how many siblings do you have again?”

“Well, legally I have three brothers and two sisters. But Duke’s adoption papers are pending, and Babs might as well be my sister. Stephanie pretty much lives with us too, so I suppose that brings the total up to four brothers and four sisters.” 

Which solves one problem, but still doesn’t answer the whole dying? and getting better??? 
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I’m supposed to look like her but I don’t know. There’s hardly any photographs. She hated having her picture taken.
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Apr. 19th, 2017 10:23 pm
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white dude in this horror movie : *translates old arabic text* *somehow it rhymes perfectly in english* 

Now I really wanna see a horrible faltering translation from one of these movies, like “Whomsoever enters this room, they shall… well, this word is like… literally it means ‘unbecome,’ but it was used as a euphemism for death, pooping, and—wait, when was this carved?  was it 15th century? Cuz it was a euphemism for sex too in the 15th century.  This is either a cursed crypt, a bathroom, or a royal bedroom. Who wants to roll the dice?”

“You guys, I’ve gotta be honest, okay? This thing’s written in some kind of weird localized dialect, and I’ve only ever studied the standard form of the language. I mean, this part right here…I can’t even tell if it’s some kind of error, or an obscure slang phrase…whatever it is, I have no idea what the fuck it means.”

‘this is written in ancient sumerian. it’s about… uh… well that word is… uh. okay this is either a poem about farming, or straight-up a nasty sex guide. it might be both. i want a shower.’

“okay see the thing is in one dialect this word is the name of a terrifying Demon but in a completely different language from the same area that has the same writing system and gave a lot of loan words to the first, it means ‘horse’ - and the context is really not helping”

“You know what?  This thing is bound in human skin and the walls are bleeding let’s just leave.”
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i like to imagine that clark kent’s search history is mostly normal but then there’s stuff like “improved superman costume concept art” because he wanted ideas

#what would you even do as an artist #if one day superman is just wearing a costume that is clearly your design #like superman was clearly looking at your deviantart #there is a chance that superman saw that art you drew of him kissing batman #why is he wearing the costume you designed #is he trying to send a message #is he saying that he really does smooch batman #did superman see your kryptosona #how much does he know 

someone said they wanted to be able to reblog this with my horrible tags

no but like… do you sue him for using your designs? Do you politely ask him to stop using your designs? Do you ask him for license fees when the Superman merchandise adopts your design as well? 

i am absolutely sure that he would find one with an artist’s comment/description that included “hey superman if you’re reading this feel free to use this anytime ok ;3″ and he would say “oh man that’s so thoughtful, thank you weedhorse69, I think I will” and like how do you explain in court that you, weedhorse69, did not intend for your statement to be any kind of contractual offer because you did not think he would ever find your public internet post with his name all over it

#people are reblogging the version of this without my final addition#offended that i would suggest clark kent wouldn’t credit the artist#missing what i consider to be the obvious facts of the matter#it’s probably a costume designed out of pure thirst too like#weedhorse69 is gonna keep his mouth shut because this way he gets to watch superman#running around town in a costume that really shows off his biceps and abs#he thought it looked summery#the league holds an intervention asking him to please stop wearing it#he does not stop no one can stop him#batman v superman II: clark please put on a real shirt

tumblr is garbage and likes to resize everything and readmores don’t work on mobile anyway so you all will just have to click through if you want to read weedhorse69′s chatlog screenshots



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this comic is everything I’ve ever wanted

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